wanderinglight

wanderinglight

Reflection on "The Stormy Decade 1978-2008"

Today I finished watching the documentary "Turbulence 1978-2008". In the 31 episodes of the documentary, countless touching and wonderful stories of China's 30 years of reform and opening up are told. Even in failure, there is still a sense of inspiration and praise.

After watching this drama, my 30-year-old self couldn't help but think about my own reflections. What kind of work is suitable for me? What about my ideals, how should I live my life?

On April 16th, I proposed to resign, officially left on June 18th, and then joined the current company. Starting to work on KA, five months have passed. On May 31st, I turned 30, and this year seems to have brought a lot of thoughts about the future.

Before, I used to think from the vast perspective of the universe, that everyone's life is meaningless. This kind of thinking is fundamental and essential. It tells me that there is no obstacle that cannot be overcome, and living on is something I must do and do well in the end. But such a life will undoubtedly be long and boring. Since I am a human being, fortunate to have thoughts, I cannot live like a stone or any other animal. You have to fight for something. Fight for what you believe in and pursue. Only such a life is exciting and fulfilling.

In "Turbulence", I see stories like this. Nations, cities, companies, individuals, always seem to face challenges and difficulties, but looking back, those things have passed. Some succeed, some fail, some live, some die, some are rich, some are poor, but it's all in the past. Everyone tries hard to live, experiencing days of excitement or boredom, fatigue or leisure, passing through those days without regret. These are the days I yearn for. The current days are not worth persisting and pursuing, not what I believe in, and certainly not regret-free.

Perhaps it was because I have always sought stability and lightness before, that I had such a tendency in job hunting. But now, can I allow myself to broaden my horizons? It may involve things you dislike or fear, but it makes the unknown choices more attractive.

Flowers bloom before my eyes
They have bloomed many, many times
Every time, tears flow down my face
Like a young man who doesn't know how to flirt

Flowers bloom before my eyes
We have walked through the past together
Every time, I write poems
Let the wind sing out inexplicable yearning

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